There is so much I’d like to say to myself. Things that I’ve known forever, thought about forever, and written down a thousand times. Repetition is my friend.
I have a tendancy to look at life like this:
Life is a constant exchange, a continous change of location and people but with one common theme of stress. There will always be a crisis to fixed and struggles to overcome. I will always be failing in some or every area of life and I will always be trying to pick myself up and come up with a new strategy on how to fail a little less next time. This semester has been wonderful in many ways but rather stressful in almost every way. The train of thought I was on would take me to the next stop of summer and see it as just a switch into more stressful circumstances. Just different relationships to balance and new situations where I’d be over my head and incapable of doing what was expected of me. All of a sudden, its next semester where I’m no longer a freshmen and I’m responsible for other people and need to grow up in 15 weeks and learn how to micro-manage my time and I wake up one morning to realize that I’m stuck in the adult world forever.
Today, I choose to look at life like this:
Life is a constant exchange, a continous change of footing and placement but I’m not being asked to jump to the top of the mountain. I’m asked to get through this weekend of finals. I’m asked to take a few more steps in becoming a better friend and student. This summer will make me a little less woefully unprepared for the next semester and each day, week, and month will prepare me a little more for the next one. All of a sudden, each little new stress is really a new opporutnity to grow and be a little more ready for the next challenge.
I could say that life is always full of stress and I just need to learn how to best deal with that reality and that would be true (and Fitwell would agree with me).
But I’d rather say that life is always full of opporutnities and adventures and new things and the small things I am doing now will mean that I will be able to better fully experience those opportunities in the future.
I could find something wrong with life if I wanted to, but I’d rather say that there is nothing wrong with being irrationally happy.